A couple of weeks ago I found myself in a most unexpected earring chat. While I started off being quite defensive, I quite enjoyed it in the end.
The man who I was in conversation with is a retired teacher. To really understand the conversation, you need to picture him. He is quite a stern man in his early 70s; a very formal gentleman, completely bald and quite an intellectual. He’s also very well groomed and generally wears a collar and tie (would never be seen wearing jeans or trainers). He also comes across as being very serious and earnest. To complete the picture he speaks clearly and well with a refined received pronunciation accent.
We were both in a group visiting a London art gallery and while we were standing at a bus stop he asked me about my earrings, pictured above, small simple gold sleeper earrings.
Looking at my ears he asked
“Tell me Doug, what does it mean when you wear earrings in both of your ears? I thought men generally wore just one”
“It means I like to wear these little earrings, in both ears”
“But isn’t it meant to show you are gay or bisexual if you have one or both ears pierced?”
“I think that used to be the case, but that’s old hat nowadays. I don’t think it means anything now”
He wanted to press me further but the bus arrived. We got on, settled in and sat opposite each other. Another of our group was in earshot and, although she kept mostly quiet, I imagine she thought it was a funny conversation.
“Yes but WHY do you wear them, I’m not sure I’ve noticed them before?”
I explained my ears were pierced when I turned 60. I think I said something about it being a little rebellious having spent my entire career toeing the line and conforming.
He found this fascinating and continued to ask and press me to talk more about them. I then noticed his brightly coloured socks showing between his black trousers (neatly pressed) and black shoes (well polished).
“Those socks must say something about you, surely?”
He blushed and brushed my comment aside saying there was nothing to read into his socks. I thought I’d touched a nerve and the woman sitting with us murmured her support for me.
So I asked “why don’t you get your ears pierced? I think that would make quite a statement!”
“Oh no, absolutely never. No, no, no, no”
By his reaction I then knew I’d touched a sensitive nerve and possibly embarrassed him. The woman sitting with us intervened by saying
“Oh I imagined you had always had your ears pierced, from a young age. I think it’s really good what you have done Doug, well done”.
“Ding ding” went the bell in the bus. We had arrived at our art gallery and so the conversation had concluded. I smiled to myself as we got off the bus having quite enjoyed the conversation after all.
Related – Ears pierced!