So my old boss got in touch with me recently, totally out of the blue and I have mixed feelings. At least she wasn’t from the blummin council.
When I say “my old boss” I really mean the chief, who I worked closely with on occasions. We were definitely on the same wavelength with many things and I think we generally got on quite well with each other. I haven’t seen her for about 10 years and when we parted company, we were certainly on good terms.
In some ways I was chuffed at her approach – some collaborative work in a think tank it turns out we are both members of. I believe I’ve been there a little longer but that doesn’t really matter.
I think I was chuffed because I took it as a compliment – and my ego appreciated it. Accordingly, I have responded in a positive way.
However, I wonder if I should feel a bit spooked. I thought I had left that world behind when I quit the jolly ol probation service, just before the disastrous privatisation effects really kicked in. The service was not what it should have been when I left and I think it has taken until now, some 10 years later, to recover to a reasonable extent. If you read the press about this, there are still big problems but who’s to say they wouldn’t have happened any way. Just look at other public services and see how things have deteriorated in recent years through chronic under funding.
Unconnected with this, I have even found myself dreaming about work and the people I left behind. I do regret not keeping in touch with more colleagues, many of whom I genuinely liked. In Hertfordshire, where I worked, my job often had me mingling with people at evening events. Some were quite sociable and I could almost feel on the edge of being drawn into the garden party set (often favoured my the judiciary). Rightly or wrong, I stepped back from that world mainly because I was too far from home and instead I wanted to know how that scene in Bedfordshire worked (alas I’m still none-the-wiser!).
Had the contact have been from the blummin council, well that would be different – that’s where the nightmares come from. Absolutely no way!
With this new invite I do feel slightly apprehensive. What could I have to offer? I am 10 years out of date, surely that’s a hindrance? Then I remember, over the years I have read so much about justice. I am a life member of two reform charities and generally read everything from cover to cover. Perhaps it’s true that everything seems to revolve in cycles, so perhaps what we need might resemble something I can remember? Nah, it is questionable how well it worked then, so why should it work now?
So while there is an element of “mixed feelings” I have tentatively agreed to take part, I cannot in all conscience refuse, especially when I hold my old boss in such high regard.